Christmas Time...Past and Present

This year my immediate family and I decided to not exchange presents. I wanted to concentrate on family and the spirit of Christmas. I think we did OK and I definitely spent less money but I was little disappointed on the actual day. I know that sounds bad but I was a little sad. I didn't really want anything either. I think it was the act of opening or not being able to anticipate. Oh...and the money I saved from Christmas spending all went to paying credit cards...so I didn't get to spend that stuff on me either.

But then I see the after Christmas shopping and how "depressed" the sales were this Christmas for retailers...and I think...I did the right thing. I am so use to doing presents and spending money...just like everyone else. I tried to help others...although I didn't do a great job of volunteering time and energy like I really could have. How little time I think of helping others...really helping others...and stop thinking of myself. What could be accomplished if we all thought that way...more often than not? Not a total dedication but a little more politeness or courtesy?

To add to the sting...while I was volunteering...even during the sorting of gifts...my thoughts went to how families might be taking advantage of the program. The kids asking for things that most families can't even afford...I know my family can't. And yet people...mostly rich...go and spend on expensive gifts because these families did not get their own gifts. Is that wrong or just being trusting and kind? I hate to think the worse or even like people don't deserve better but I am tainted. I didn't have a lot when I was young and my family rarely asked for help. When we couldn't afford Christmas...we just didn't get gifts. I didn't like it but I didn't know differently. Were we being stupid not asking for help or am I better for the experience? I think not. I like appreciating what I have now...especially since it is more than I had then, but I tolerate less I think. I take solace in that I have enough know how or "class" to not say these things in public or to those that it might hurt. Just in blogs where I can vocalize my thoughts...